Let's Talk

Posts Categorized: The Counselor Is In

Grieving our Losses

Throughout life we experience losses: of jobs, security, dreams, childhoods, marriages, health, and loved ones. The seasons of life all hold within their walls the need to grieve the losses that are attached. For most moments of transition, we give ourselves a few moments to think sadly and perhaps fondly about what we are giving…

Endings Leave a Bit of Ourselves Behind

In many cultures, there are rituals that take us from one stage of life to another. Coming of age ceremonies or rites of passage symbolize leaving childhood to enter adulthood. Sometimes the rituals involved are physically demanding – others are simply a public recognition and celebration after instruction. Religions also have symbolic ceremonies to represent…

Opportunities Found in Adversities

It is in our adversities where we find God waiting for us: to comfort, encourage and give us hope. When the Old Testament Prophet Elijah fled for his life from Queen Jezebel’s wrath, first into the desert and then retreating to the mountains, he was so exhausted he wanted to die. He struggled with his inner fears, doubts…

Learning from Adversity

Reframing, acceptance and letting go are all mind sets and approaches we can use when faced with adversity. Life’s difficulties, however, are not just something to get over but they give us an opportunity to grow. Difficulties are often seen as obstacles or problems we want to quickly overcome. Yet within adversity is the opportunity…

Making A Successful Transition

Years ago, I was privileged to attend a weekend college class led by guest lecturer, William Bridges, who wrote the book, “Transitions, Managing Change.” In his book, he addressed the everyday transitions we make but seldom think about: getting married, becoming a parent, retirement. Each requires leaving behind who you were in order to embrace…

Life Is A Dance

Life is a dance – a process that requires  flexibility while learning how to change position and location while maintaining our balance. Life is movement – we are going somewhere. It is never static – never the same – but constantly changing and evolving. As we learn the music of life, we can adjust our movements and take charge of change and and our…

Acceptance Leads to Problem Solving

Acceptance is a concept – a state of mind – a way of looking at life and problems. It is a way of thinking that can be applied to any circumstance. It is a pivotal point that takes us from what we can’t do to possibilities, options and choices. Problems have a magnetic way of…

Acceptance – Part I

Reframing requires acceptance; accepting what is happening in order to find new options. My last two blogs examined reframing traumatic events in our life. But we can address ongoing problems by reframing as well. Maybe it is a disintegrating marriage or relationship, symptoms of children in trouble, health concerns, aging parents, constant battle with in-laws,…

How To Reframe

How do we reframe? Reframing takes what life has handed us and looks at it in a different way. Within any drastic life change, our first response is usually shock. When you lose your job, can’t make your house payment, or have been diagnosed with a life altering or threatening disease, the crisis takes center…

Reframing Your Circumstance

How do you frame your world? Within our frames of reference we find all the experiences, emotions and information we have stored throughout our lifetime. These frames of reference form our perceptions and beliefs, what we say to ourselves and others. They motivate and guide our thinking, our emotional responses and our behavior. How we…