A bridge takes you from one side of a divide to another. When we are transitioning from a loss we need to build a bridge from our ending to a new beginning.
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Making a transition from unwanted endings is never easy. In fact it can be very uncomfortable and unsettling.
After the death of my husband at a time when our professional careers were diminishing, my loss created enormous changes in my life. Yet, as difficult and unwelcome as this loss was, I made some important discoveries about myself that resulted in new meaning and excitement for life again.
You might think this transitional period unproductive as you explore options and discover more about yourself.
But the work you do during this time period is vital and can keep you from repeating the same mistakes over and over again or continue to apply outdated and outlived information to your life.
Making a transition is never a linear path. It goes back and forth from what was to what is today and continues the process of acceptance and letting go.
Change is as important to our health, mental, spiritual and physical as the air we breathe. Yet I am constantly amazed at the deep resistance we have to change.
We can’t go back and glue the pieces of our life together again. But we can pick up the pieces and find new ways to construct a new and even better life.
In a retreat I put together a couple of years ago entitled “Turn Your Gravel Pit into a Beautiful Garden,” I described how we can take the ugliness of our lives and turn it into something beautiful and positive. No matter how bad the past, no matter what was destroyed, in the rubble that remains are the materials to create a something beautiful and new. You are the architect and designer.
So during this month as I blog as we address emotions that keep us in resistance – fear, anxiety and worry, I invite you to put the following affirmation on your refrigerator door and repeat it every day as often as you can.
“I am excited about life and the wonderful discoveries I am making about myself and the possibilities and potential for my future.”
I challenge you to make this a mindset as you go through this self exploration process. The possibilities for a new and wonderful life are limitless. All we need is to believe in ourselves.
©2013 Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC