When we stop and think calmly and carefully about how we live our lives and what influences our decision making and behaviors, it can have a sobering effect. In that process we are confronted with ourselves.
There is an instinctive tendency to blame others, circumstances or events for all the things that have gone wrong in our lives, the opportunities missed or to support all the reasons why we didn’t accomplish what we wanted while embellishing all the things we have done right and how good we are.
Somewhere in-between we will find a more accurate reality. There are many things outside our control or ability to change or influence. We will have advantages and will encounter disadvantages.
We are a composite of traits, abilities and complex ways we use to analyze, understand and solve life’s problems. We have weaknesses and strengths. The ability to recognize both helps us to balance our responses to life in a more productive and constructive way.
Periodically reflecting on where we are in life’s journey gives us a new opportunity to examine the choices we make, our motives behind those choices, and the progress we have made.
When we face our vulnerabilities, weaknesses and shortcomings, we are no longer governed or controlled by them. In becoming honest we can let go of things that don’t work and replace them with ways that do.
We are not a prisoner to habits of thinking and doing unless we choose to be.
Adversity, no matter what its causes, will challenge us to re-think how we view the world and ourselves. It will confront us with our deficits, inadequacies, shortcomings, and lack of skill development. But it will also reveal our strengths, emotional toughness, resilience and abilities yet to be developed.
Life is a process with many ups and downs where we will be challenged and confronted. But it can be the best of times because we will get to know ourselves.
Marlene Anderson